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How to boost your self-confidence?

Published by Nisha Kohli on

Self-confidence is one of the most important traits to have as a human being, whether it’s in your workplace, at home, or in your everyday life. It counts everywhere.

But do you even know what makes a person confident? Well, there is no one-stop shop where you can get the recipe and all the ingredients that you will need to prepare the food item called self-confidence. 

Then what is it, that matters the most when it comes to being self-confident? It’s the personality you carry, it’s the way you behave or act with the general public.

Have you ever been in a situation where despite being capable and talented, you didn’t get the opportunity to lead a group of people? I know it feels really bad when you have the capability but still, it happened. 

You know, the reason lies within you.

There might be a possibility that you are not very good at dealing with people and your boss knows it. Therefore, he decided to give this job to someone else and not you. 

These little but huge things together make you feel that you lack self-confidence. But don’t worry, here are 5 ways that will help you boost your self-confidence. They are basically little shifts that you have to make in how you see and visualize things, and you are good to go.

1. Know your worth

Self-esteem is one of the most important factors when it comes to increasing your self-confidence.

Oftentimes people don’t see themselves as worthy enough to do what they feel. They don’t really believe in themselves which makes them dependent on others. People with low self-esteem don’t celebrate their life, they are the one who always feels that everything bad is happening to them only. 

Well, I want to tell them, it’s not true. Here is a quote, that goes like this

Life is happening for you and not to you.

TONY ROBBINS

Know, that you are one of your kind and your views and opinions matter too. Think of yourself as a unique personality who is provided with unique gifts by the universe. Know, that there is something that only you can offer to society and you have the power to make a change. So, know it. Know your worth.

2. Learn when to say no

Have you ever been in a situation where your boss wants you to take on certain responsibilities for an upcoming project and despite being tight on schedule and having a lot to do on your list, you just say YES to him because you don’t want to sound rude? 

It happens to a lot of people. You are not alone.

A lot of people feel hard to say no to others for things they don’t want or feel like doing. And because they want others not to hate them or like them even more, they just nod in their favor, even if it costs them a lot. They might not see the consequences but they are putting themselves in trouble only by doing so, by being the people pleaser. This puts them into stress; the stress of how will they manage everything properly, or what if they won’t be able to, or what if, what if, what if.

Saying a clear ‘NO’ acts as a lifesaver in situations like these. I’m not saying you to be rude to your seniors and say no directly to their faces. But you can tell the truth; you can tell them politely that it would be very nice to be a part of this project but you have a lot of other stuff to do and you won’t be able to do this as your top priority. 

This way you can come up with a clean-green signal. And even if they push you to take that responsibility anyway, you won’t be the one who would be responsible for the mess. You know what I mean.

This is not applicable in just workplaces but in your everyday life too. It works with everyone whether it’s your friend or one of your family members. Just say no when you feel it; it gives you a tremendous amount of self-confidence, and it increases your self-esteem too. 

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3. Don’t take discouragement seriously

You often have heard this saying, you cannot please everyone and it’s an absolute true fact. By the way, in my opinion, you should not even try to please everyone around you, it’s just a waste of your time and effort.

Studies have shown that women are the ones who have more of this people-pleasing instinct compared to men. Roughly about 7 out of every 10 women have this. 

Discouragement is a part of living, don’t take it seriously. You cannot expect anyone literally anyone, whether it’s your family, friends, colleagues at the workplace, your spouse, children, or any other dear one, to encourage and appreciate you all the time. There will be times when they don’t and there is no need to feel bad about it. Instead, take this as feedback and improve accordingly.

If you take it seriously, then there will always be this thought in your mind, what if they don’t like it? And guess what, this thought won’t let you be yourself. You will always try to do things that make them happy and not you, which is not good.  

And when it comes to self-confidence, these things help to lower it down and you absolutely don’t want it.

4. Talk to yourself

This image says talk to yourself.

Have you tried self-taking? If you haven’t then you should do it. Self-talking comes out to be a very good way to increase your self-confidence and it also helps manage your stress levels.

Everyone talks to themselves in their mind, but when it comes to increasing your self-confidence, you should consider talking to yourself – OUT LOUD.

It’s a very effective way to let everything that’s in your heart come out which by the way is very necessary. Talking to yourself increases your self-confidence and gives you mental peace, as now you have yourself to whom you can talk about anything you feel like.

You can practice talking to yourself in the mirror for about 10-15 minutes every day. This practice will give you an effective boost in your confidence as it’s you only whom you are talking to. You know what your flaws are and you can work on them accordingly. 

5. Stop doubting yourself 

Often times people say certain things that they truly believe in and think about it the very next moment. Their mind goes like, Oh…did I say it right? Did I do the right thing? I shouldn’t have said that. 

And some are even worse, they don’t believe in themselves. They don’t believe that they can be right, that they can have a unique point of view. People like them don’t really expect themselves to be good at something. They are always doubting themselves which sometimes makes others take advantage of them.

This image says believe in yourself.

I mean come on people, you haven’t done anything wrong. So, just stop questing and doubting yourself. Just be brave enough to stand strong. Take a stand for yourself and fight for what you believe in. If you don’t take a stand for things that you believe are right, you will just find yourself doing what others want you to do.

If you don’t believe in yourself, then how can you expect others to believe in you? No one even cares how good you are at what you do, they only care about how you present yourself and get them the results. 

So, just be bold and brave, you haven’t done or said anything wrong. If you believe in certain things, then just be courageous and take a stand for yourself. 

Conclusion

There are actually no typical steps that work for everyone that you can also follow and it will boost your self-confidence to the sky. No, it doesn’t work like that. Every individual is different and hence their strengths and weaknesses are too. 

A person might feel it hard to talk to others confidently while the other may not. They both might have different points of view when it comes to being confident.

And here, the 5 ways that I talked about, are more on a broad-level basis to help as many people as possible, which are

  • Know your self-worth
  • Learn to say ‘NO’
  • Don’t take discouragement seriously
  • Talk to yourself 
  • Stop doubting yourself

Hope this will helps you to boost your self-confidence. What are the others ways that you apply to your life that boost your self-confidence? Do tell me in the comments below.

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Nisha Kohli

Hey, I'm Nisha Kohli. A philanthropist, an optimist, and a believer who believes that every big change starts with the small and little change that we do within ourselves

2 Comments

chhaya · August 23, 2022 at 11:29 pm

Thanks 🙂

chhaya · August 23, 2022 at 11:29 pm

Thanks:)

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